#29

Hey peeps,

Love unreturned is like a question without an answer.

Once upon a time I was falling in love, but now I'm only falling apart. I'm extremely not fine. Yesterday S texted me about a guy who kinda wanna flirt S girlfriend. I was like TF? S already has a girlfriend? That moment I really felt wanna cry river. I wish I can build a bridge and get over it but I can't. I'm totally in loved with him. Then S asked me to on my msn. I did what he told me. He told me the whole story about a guy who wanna steal his girlfriend. Well, kinda. I was trying to make him happy. 

I don't know why I'm doing this. If I could have one lifetime wish, one wish that would come true, I'll wish for you. But my wish will never be granted. He seem happy with his new girlfriend. Maybe part of loving is learning to let go. You asked me who's the lucky guy on my status. I said SLYI. Boy, you're damn clever. Yes its you. You said you were sorry. And you asked me whether I'm okay or not. I was lying. I'm not okay. Tears kept falling on my face. I don't know how to make it stop. 

You ask me how my day was as if it is same everyday. I say that I'm okay but you really don't know how I feel. You ask me to promise you that I'll be fine. The truth is, I'll never be fine. Never. He asked me to write 'sumo' 3 times if I'm really okay. I write it 2 times only. He kept saying sorry. I don't want to make him feel bad about it. I'm sorry S. I was trying so hard to hide my sadness. I wish I was a kid again, because skinned knees are easier to fix then broken hearts. Haih, i can't continue writing anymore. I wanna hear he call me Amoi. This is sad. Bye.

Jan 23rd 2011